Single and Clueless

I recall a conversation I had with a friend years ago. He had just recently become a single dad and was bemoaning the fact that life felt like high school again. I am discovering how true this is.

Being in a marriage for nearly a decade rusts your "single senses." All of the sudden you're thrown into a weird situation where you're not sure if another person likes you or not and you can't figure out what to do. It's like high school all over again, but way more complicated. Throw kids into the mix and you've got more than just two people to think of.

It's weird, awkward, and a little frustrating.

If I were to approach being a single adult the way I approached high school, I'd just automatically assume that anyone I like doesn't feel the same way. When you go through puberty as the chubby girl with glasses (that none of the boys look at twice) you assume automatic rejection. It just comes along with the territory. At best, you have male friends who just see you as "one of the guys." 

That's an area where I'm comfortable: the friend zone. I'm quite at ease there. Problem is, that doesn't happen as easily when you're an adult... unless your guy friends are gay. (That makes things gloriously simplistic.) 

I'm excellent at reading people when observing from an outside position, but for some strange reason I'm utterly clueless when it involves me. I figure I must be misinterpreting signals and go about my day obliviously. I have no idea how to properly flirt... actually, I have no clue what I'm doing at all. I can only hope that when the right man comes along, he's brave enough to just come out and tell me, because I don't take hints very well.