I'm a little embarrassed to admit this, but I tried online dating... for about 24 hours. I was curious but in the end, disappointed. It felt like I was online shopping for a boyfriend... oh wait...
After a few "Hey, you look hot! Let's get to know each other better" type messages, I shut the account down. Not sure what I was expecting, but it felt so weird and awkward. Detached. Impersonal. Not for me.
I realized that even after all of the crap I've been through, deep down I'm still a hopeless (and stupid) romantic. I still think two people can just meet in real life. If two people want to spend the rest of their lives together, shouldn't their current lives (social circles, activities, interests/hobbies) already run parallel with each other? Then it's simply a matter of joining hands and going through life together, right?
I felt a strong urge to just wait. There is someone for you. Just be patient. I know it sounds weird. It's not that I literally hear a voice in my head, rather I have a strong intuition that is always right. Every time I didn't follow my "gut instinct," (even if I couldn't explain it at the time) I have always regretted it. Every single time. Call it intuition or leading from the Holy Spirit, but I've learned to go with it.
So I will wait. One thing that I've learned is that I'd rather stay single and wait for what I really want than compromise again just because I'm lonely. What I want is someone who loves the Lord. Shares the same interests. Loves what I love. Has a passion for people and relationships like I do. Isn't afraid to be vulnerable even when I am. Takes on fatherhood even though it's scary and daunting.
What I want... what I want more than anything is to be where God wants me. He knows the desires of my heart. He knows what is best for me, so He can work out the details. In the meantime, I am content to wait for His best. Just wait.
Next time I come over, we are soooo making a Tinder account for you.
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