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How Is Your Heart?

Asking how a person is doing is a standard greeting. The usual reply, "Fine," is equally standard. I think we use it so often it doesn't mean much anymore. We don't truly care how that person is doing and they in turn don't really care to say how they really are. "How are you?" has become a trite greeting, a polite way of glossing over people's true feelings. Even amongst close friends, we might ask "How are you feeling?" but that doesn't necessarily reach the heart of the matter.

A few months ago, I ran into one of my old college friends. We hung out a lot back in the day. We worked at the same church, carpooled together to work or different church functions, and I fed him (and his roommates) dinner on more than one occasion. We went our seperate ways after graduation and probably hadn't seen each other in at least five years until we bumped into one another in a crowded church hallway. I got the biggest, warmest hug (which probably has special healing powers).

"How have you been?! What have you been up to the last five years?"

My smile fell a little.

"Um, well... my dad passed away from a heart attack last June... and then my husband filed for divorce 6 weeks later."

A look of utter shock crossed his face. "Wow... I... that's a lot."

"Yeah, but I'm managing. I've got a lot of support, so I'll be okay."

Another hug.

"So... how's your heart?"

I was taken aback by this question... and deeply touched. No one had ever asked me that before. How was my heart? I tend to ignore it a lot. I'm not one for mushy feelings. I prefer my brain and logic over personal emotions. They get so messy. I had to stop and really think about his question.

"Hurt... broken..." was about all I could get out of my emotionally stunted mouth. (It's funny that I have such a hard time dealing with my own pain and emotions, and yet I can easily connect and empathize with others.) 

The amount of soul-searching that one question brought about was phenomenal. Instead of asking how someone is doing or feeling, I should be more concerned with their heart. 

So, how is your heart?

"A glad heart makes a cheerful face, but by sorrow of heart the spirit is crushed." (Proverbs 15:13 ESV)

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